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Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Martha Edwards: Parents & the Career Choice Process


When I was about to enter into the university, I was going through the courses available in my school of choice with my dad. He stopped at marketing and said: this is a very good course, you should go for it. Me? Marketing? No way. Daddy asked why? “Have you forgotten I’m the worst mathematics student on earth I asked?” His reply was: “you can survive it.”
Then I made my final statement: “if you want me to go for it, I will. Though we both know I’m not sound in mathematics. I’m saying this today; if I FAIL in flying colours after studying marketing for you, invariably wasting your hard earned money spent on my education, DON’T blame me.” He looked at me and said: “do whatever you feel like doing BUT make sure you don’t fail, because if you fail, I’ll do a lot worse than blame you.”
I’ve seen and heard a lot of people complain about their courses of study and their dislike for them. Not searching too far, I have a friend who loved and still loves accounting, but her mum a single parent wants her to study medicine and become a doctor because she is a nurse. I hear this medical thing is either a FAIL or PASS situation, no middle ground. She struggled through secondary school, and is now struggling in the university. This friend of mine is in her third year university since the year she got into one and it’s about 5 years now. There’s always a story that moves her from one school to another school.
There are a lot of parents who think some courses are not good enough for their children or do not hold water. (I stand to be corrected). I once overheard a parent telling her child who wanted to study sociology or rather had a passion for the course that it was a waste of time. I had to jump into the conversation though uninvited (pardon my manners, the matter was a very crucial one) that sociology is a very beautiful course with a lot prospects. Any course that has a relationship with man and his environment is never a waste. It can never fade out.
Many times, parents stop their children from pursuing their dreams either educationally or vocationally because of their own bias opinions. I’m not saying our parents do not know what they are saying or doing, they definitely do due to their vast experiences and they always want the best for us. What I am saying is; when push comes to shove, and a life determining decision has to be made, let the children make their own choices.
A lot of children want to be actors, writers, musicians, health givers, volunteer workers and a whole lot of other things. Some just want to step out of the normal family “lawyer” “doctor” order. But their parents are a great stumbling block to them. Some go as far as refusing to sponsor their education or even throwing them out of the house, thereby leaving them with the option of having a roof over their and forgetting their dreams or pursuing their dreams and become homeless and without support.
Let us look at America’s got Talent’s Heavenly Joy. She’s five years old and a beautiful singer. I can say categorically that some parents would have stopped their child from contesting or created shyness and low self esteem in their child out of their words and actions.
All these in my opinion are very wrong. Let the child be what he or she wants to be. Give your advice, support and prayers even though the choice doesn’t suit you. Chances are you’d be happy you allowed that child make the decision.
Remember, one very necessary ingredient for SUCCESS is PASSION. If you have a passion for what you do or you’re doing or you want to do, it’ll drive you to super duper achievements.
I’ll wrap this up with a quote from Dr. Shad Helmstetter’s book titled choices. It says: “The highest levels are mostly certainly filled with those who chose to be there.” Let us make our choices, and we definitely won’t disappoint you.

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